


If I could start again

by Cali_brate



Category: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
Genre: Gender Neutral Farmer, One Shot, Other, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-10
Updated: 2019-12-10
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:40:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21738481
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cali_brate/pseuds/Cali_brate
Summary: Shane gets surprised with a karaoke night at the bar. He just wants to sit and drink his beer, and not think about the farmer.
Relationships: Shane/Player (Stardew Valley)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 20





	If I could start again

**Author's Note:**

> This has been bouncing around my head for a while, and I figured I might as well type it out.

Shane wasn’t one to make friends.

He had the two people he cared about: Marnie and Jas. And they were enough.

He might add Gus and Emily to that list, but only when he was at the saloon. But that was less caring about them, and more caring about the beer they provided for him.

Sam he cared about selfishly as well - he couldn’t stand working at Joja alone. That might actually push him over the edge.

Everyone else in town he couldn’t care less about. Sure he’d be civil to them when necessary, but when it came down to it, if he never saw them again, he probably wouldn’t notice.

Then the farmer showed up.

The first time they met, the farmer bounded over to him with a “you must be Shane!” and a big goofy smile on their face. Shane had responded with a grunt and continued on his way.

Which maybe wasn’t the best idea, because since then the farmer had made sure to see him everyday. Usually in the mornings on his way to Joja the farmer would catch up to him and try to talk.

It had taken a few weeks of this persistence before Shane had responded with more than a grunt.

Then the farmer started to sit with him at the bar. The first time he tried to ignore them. They didn’t even say much to him, mostly talking to Emily or whoever else was near them.

But after a week of that, Shane opened up a little. It was probably the alcohol, but now when the farmer walked in he could feel his heartbeat speed up. He would occasionally offer a smile to them, and when they didn’t come to him right away, he’d get a feeling he didn’t want to think too hard about.

The farmer wasn’t like the rest of the town. Sure they all had their issues, but Shane could see under the bubbly surface, the farmer was just like him. It would break out occasionally, the depressed side of the farmer. But often they would cover it back up. Shane had given up trying to hide it a long time ago. It was too much work trying to hide it, and once he started drinking it became obvious anyway.

So when the farmer walked in, arms linked with Sam and Abigail, Shane felt something stir inside him. The trio walked to the far side of the saloon, next to the jukebox. Sam set down the guitar he was holding, and Abigail says something that made the farmer laugh.

Shane hunkered down, trying his best to hide behind his beer. Jealousy was creeping up on him and he really didn’t want to think about why.

“Are you going to sing something?” Emily asked, replacing Shane’s cover with a full beer.

“What?” Shane snapped, more aggressive than he meant.

“We’ve been talking about it all week! The farmer and Sam thought it would be fun to do a karaoke night,” Emily responded, unfazed by Shane.

“Oh yeah.”

Shane sort of remember the farmer saying it. Most of his thoughts clouded by alcohol or avoiding the feelings he might have towards the farmer.

“Shane!”

The farmer skipped their way to his corner. A smile took up their whole face, and that face was a lot closer to Shane than he would like.

“Farmer,” he grunted to them. He picked up his beer and held it as a shield in front of him, trying to ignore how warm his face was.

“Are you gonna sing?”

“No.”

The farmer frowned at his response.

“Why not?”

Shane glared at them. “Why would I?” He took a big gulp of his beer.

“You’re gonna sing.” The farmer said as if that would convince him, and then turned and walked back to where Sam and Abigail were.

Shane looked into his beer. There was no way he was going to sing. He came here to drink and forget everyone in the stupid town existed. He came here to ignore life for a little bit. He came here to talk to the farmer and -

Nope. Not thinking about that.

Sam sang first, some song Shane had probably heard, and continued playing guitar for everyone else. From there the saloon got louder and brighter as the rest of the town flooded in.

The farmer finished their song, something about love that Shane was trying to ignore. They finished and walked straight up to Shane again.

“Ok Shane, it’s your turn!”

“I said no.”

“Oh c'mon, it’ll be fun.”

“Why, so everyone can laugh at me?

"No, Shane. Really? It’ll be fine.”

“No.”

“Please?”

Shane sighed. He had drank his beer quicker than normal because of everything going on, so the alcohol was hitting him a little harder than normal.

“Y'know what?” Shane stood up. He was about the same height as the farmer, and he held eye contact with them. “Whatever.”

He pushed past them and up to Sam, who was startled as Shane snatched the guitar out of his hands.

He looked out over the crowd, just about the whole town was here. Great.

Sitting down on a stool, Shane played a few chords. It had been a long time since he had played the guitar.

He looked at the farmer for a moment, and began.

“ _ I hurt myself today _

_ To see if I still feel _

_ I focus on the pain _

_ The only thing that’s real. _ ”

It was one of those songs that he had listened to on repeat when he was trying to hide who he really was. And maybe he was trying to hide right now.

“ _ What have I become _

_ My sweetest friend _

_ Everyone I know _

_ Goes away in the end. _ ”

Shane looked around at the crowd. Everyone seemed shocked. Whether it was because he was participating in something stupid like this, or if it was because his singing voice was awful, he didn’t care. He didn’t really care about anything. Singing for this stupid karaoke was just to get the farmer off his back for the night so he could go back to drinking himself half to death.

“ _ If I could start again _

_ A million miles away _

_ I would keep myself _

_ I would find a way. _ ”

Shane played the last chord of the song, looking at the ground. Now that it was over, he felt very vulnerable. He stood up and handed the guitar back to Sam.

“Dude, that was beautiful,” Sam said, his eyes wide. “I didn’t think you could sing like that!”

Shane scowled at him, and turned to walk back to his corner. The silence over the saloon hit him like a truck.

Aunt Marnie, standing next to Lewis at one of the tables, looked on the verge of tears. She walked up and wrapped her arms around Shane, a silent sob shuddering through her body. She squeezed him tight, and walked back to her spot.

“Shane, that was incredible!” Abigail jumped up beside him.

He got a few more compliments as he made his way to his beer.

Weird.

Shane sat back in his chair, and chugged half of the new beer Emily had set out for him. Slowly the silence faded out as everyone started talking. Probably about what a loser he-

“Shane, that was amazing!” The farmer also wrapped their arms around his shoulders.

Ok, Marnie was allowed to hug him. The farmer? They weren’t allowed to do that. He shrugged their arms off, and turned to look at them.

“What do you mean, amazing?” what the farmer had said caught up to him. Tears were slowly falling down their face, but they had that big smile that made Shane feel.

“I mean, it was, you are, um.”

The farmer kissed his cheek.

“You have such a beautiful voice, you should sing more,” they said, their face still next to his.

He looked at then blankly for a moment. “Did you just kiss me?”

The farmer’s face turned bright red. “Oh, uh, sorry I just- that was beautiful and -”

Shane leaned forward off his chair and kissed them. This was not how his night was supposed to go.

**Author's Note:**

> The song is "Hurt", the Johnny Cash version. It just seems like a very Shane song, so every time it comes up on my playlist I think about him. Also posted on my tumblr.


End file.
